Opinion piece: "Letter to the World on Make-up."

Today my 18 year old male cousin said in an Ulta where we were shopping at that he thought “Some women who wear too much makeup look really weird without it and overdo it but I guess women who wear just a little enhance how they look; they look better.” What is too much makeup? And how is it any of your business ? Were the first two questions that popped up in my mind. I exclaimed, “that’s great and all but I look awful without makeup! I have scars and acne and terribly dark under eye circles and just ugh…” He and his sister quickly tried to reassure me that I did not look hideous without makeup. I, of course, did and do not believe them. His sister did come to my side by saying, “You would think differently if you were a girl.” He replied, “No I wouldn’t. I would be gorgeous.” Of course, we all laughed at this (including the employee standing nearby). I think we were laughing at both his conceit and the idea that he could place himself in those shoes. Place himself in a woman’s shoes? I don’t want to sound sexist but how many 6’3”, masculine, football playing bros can? I certainly didn’t think my cousin could at that moment. I can’t fully place myself in his shoes either. Though we come from two close (generally “white”) families and a similar socio-economic state he was male and I was female. Now, I am a feminist and think men and women are entirely equal but I do think (in general) we are gendered and taught to think, act and react differently (to some degree). I oppose this but I acknowledge its existence. I also acknowledge a patriarchy and the fact that “white” is considered “better” than “non-white” and that men have the upper hand despite being slightly less numerous. So a handsome, fit, successful, intelligent, young, white, preppy, masculine male is very much different from me (an okay looking, overweight, slightly set back, intelligent, young, white, “indie,” fem + masc female). There is no denying the differences. In a society that places so much value on beauty, especially on female beauty we need makeup. I need foundation and cover up and powder to turn my blotchy, (currently) blemished and dark circled skin one even color. I need eyeshadow and liner and mascara to pop my eyes. I need blush to bring back some color to my cheeks (the only place that needs pink) and I need brow powder to dark my brows and lastly (at the very least, if no lipstick) lip balm to moisturize. Does this seem excessive to some? Sure, it only takes my 15 minutes but to each their own in their time spent. I LIKE my makeup routine. Is it nice to take away my blemish cover up when I have clear skin? YES. But the rest I enjoy. Sometimes it is fun to have bright color on your lips or eyes. To slightly tweak your natural features or cause one to pop more than the rest. It is slight editing to what you find attractive. My cousin said that it was “cheating” for women to do this (And men!) I disagree, it is highlighting what was already there. Is it editing to darken parts of the nose, jaw and cheek to make bones appear thinner and stronger? Sure but it isn’t taking away what is actually there. It is merely a slight illusion to make me feel better. I won’t take a saw to my bones but why can’t I take a brush to it? Plus it is a hell of a lot less staining then a tattoo which is a nearly permanent change to your skin. You weren’t born with ink on you… So isn’t that cheating? ;) Really though, I am so tired of these arguments.. If I want to glop on a pound of foundation I CAN. It is MY body. My skin. My emotions, self esteem and self-love. Stop judging the person and change the system. Thank you.